When the economy takes a dip, even a severe one, hold yourself up, focus on your need or desire to start a successful practice as a Parenting Coach, and move forward on the new journey. Put on blinders so you don’t get distracted. You will be absolutely amazed by how your practice grows.

I stood up strongly, faced forward and put on blinders for several years to make two successful businesses grow. Here is what happened to me after 9/11. The seminar trainings my husband conducted died for several years after 9/11. A mentor named Seymour Rifkin shared his secret to becoming a multi-millionaire after being a teacher on Chicago’s South Side. Rifkin’s main suggestion was to focus for one hour each day

Posted by: coachingparents | July 10, 2010

Dads Building Self-esteem in Daughters


A dad is the first man a daughter loves and her experiences with her Dad are relationship predictors for her years to come. Positive involvement by Dads in their daughter’s lives correlated with a list of positive benefits such as “better peer relationships; fewer behavior problems;  higher educational / occupational mobility relative to parents’; capacity for empathy; non-traditional attitudes to earning and childcare; more satisfying adult sexual partnerships; and higher self-esteem, life-satisfaction and ‘locus of control” (Pleck, J.H., & Masciadrelli, B.P. (2004). Paternal Involvement by U.S. residential fathers: levels, sources and consequences. In M.E. Lamb (ed.), The Role of the Father in Child Development (4th ed.). Hoboken, NJ: John Wiley & Sons.)

One way to ensure that our daughters develop a healthy self-esteem is by showing them respect while they are young. If you expect them not interrupt you while you are talking, then set the example and don’t interrupt them while they are speaking. If you want them to believe in themselves, sincerely tell them how wonderful they are and how glad you are that they are in your life.

Another way to show that you value your daughter is by spending time doing what she wants to do. Give her your undivided attention. Just think of all the errands that kids go on with you. Do you think they enjoy waiting in line at the grocery store or sitting in a chair twice too big for them while you get your hair cut? Probably not, but any situation can lend itself to quality time spent if you make it educational and fun. You just might get better cooperation from as a result.
At age seven, Karrie is just as at home in her backyard climbing a tree as she is playing in her Barbie doll castle. She has pretended to be a princess since she was old enough to walk in her mother’s oversized high heels. But, her father, John, has a tendency to tease her about being a princess as she primps in front of the mirror or puts on a beauty pageant for anyone who will sit still long enough for her to change into her next costume.

Inwardly, John is thinking his daughter will grow up to be spoiled and think everyone should cater to her. What he may not realize is that his daughter’s self-esteem is fragile and that she truly needs his approval. In pre-adolescent years, girls are forming their opinion of how men are supposed to treat women. The examples dads set and the attention they pay their daughters at this age will go with these little ladies the rest of their lives.

I am thrilled to see that Dad’s involvement  has emerged in the current generation. Fathering has taken a huge step forward and the absent fathers typical of my childhood have been replaced by dads who are home a lot more and are spending quality time with their children. Many mothers have become the major bread winner in the household as husbands stay home and care for the kids. Who says men can’t change diapers and give a bottle just as well as a woman? Why shouldn’t women make as much (or more) money than men? Why shouldn’t boys take ballet lessons? What’s wrong with girls playing soldier? This is a healthy shift in cultural trends that I feel certain will bring about an empowered next generation.

Posted by: coachingparents | July 9, 2010

Good Parenting Skills 101


Parenting is a skill set which can be learned. Being a parent is a joyous thing, but good parenting skills are something that you have to continuously work at. You will never be a “perfect” parent, because we all make mistakes. Here are a few tips to ensure that you are being the best parent that you can be.

1. Show Love

Always give your children a lot of love. Tell them “I love you” and make sure they know that they are special to you. Provide them with a lot of hugs and kisses and always be there when they need a shoulder to cry on. But real love is more than saying a few words and being available. The behavior of loving means being respectful to your child, showing kindness, caring enough to spend time in taking a walk, reading a story, and sharing stories of your own life.

2. Listen When Your Child Talks

Listening to your children shows them that they are important to you. No matter how strange or ridiculous it may be, listen to your child’s stories, ideas and complaints. When you listen to your children then they know that you are interested in what they have to say. Don’t just pretend to be listening, as children can quickly see that you are really not that interested and that you are just pretending. Value their ideas and ask them to tell you more.

3. Make Your Child Feel Safe

Children are defenseless in life and they may be scared easily by things they don’t understand. Comforting your child at every stage in life will provide them with the security they need. They need to know that you are there for them and that you will protect them. They also need to see that you have taken steps to protect them.

4. Provide Order and Organization

Children need a regular and daily schedule. They need to have meals, naps and bedtimes at consistent times throughout the day. Depending upon your child’s age, you can plan routines together. For example, after school, does your child need a play break, homework time or food snack. What do you expect them to complete before dinner? Before they go to bed, they need to take a bath, brush their teeth and get their school supplies ready for the next day. How do you and your child organize your morning without rushing?

5. Appreciate Your Child

You can show appreciation is so many small ways, and children truly need to know that they are doing well and that you are proud of them. Use frequent pats on the back, smiles, praise for an achievement well-earned or task accomplished well.

6. Consistency is Key

Your rules don’t have to be the same rules you had when you were growing up, but whatever rules you choose to have need to be enforced on a consistent basis. This goes for mom and dad, family members and baby sitters. If two parents are raising the child, then they both need to have the same rules.

7. Spend Time with Your Children

Children thrive on the time they get to spend with their parents. Little trips to the park to play with the dog or reading before bedtime will go along way with your children. Many bad behaviors stem from a lack of attention on the parents part and the child is simply trying to get your attention.

If you need help developing good parenting skills, then there are several resources available to parents. Parent coaching can provide you with a parenting skills assessment and will help you develop a parenting skills curriculum that can be utilized on a daily basis.


(PRLEAP.COM) Fort Worth, Texas – Single parenting is a difficult job, but with a new Trainer, Ilene Dillon, MSW, at the Academy for Coaching Parents International]Academy for Coaching Parents International (ACPI), professional parenting coaches will be armed with expert information that helps single parents and their children succeed.

Ilene Dillon, M.S.W. has taken on the role of trainer for the specialty niche, Coaching Single Parents, at ACPI, providing new perspectives to the academy’s offerings. The course, Coaching Single Parents, will be a series of 5 two-hour teleconferences offered on Monday evenings, beginning July 5th. 2010. Dillon will offer a new way to define the “job” of parenting, along with an approach based on Principles that ease the usual frustrations of Single Parenting.

Ilene Dillon is known as The Emotional Pro. Author of 19 books, workbooks and CD sets, including a teacher’s manual on emotional literacy, Ilene holds two California professional psychotherapy licenses, with over 40 years of service. Ilene has been featured in publications such as The San Francisco Chronicle, Care Notes, Feel.com, Personal Excellence and Woman’s Day, and has been a worldwide practicing coach for the past eight years. ACPI’s new course, Coaching Single Parents, will focus on topics specifically related to the difficulties inherent in raising successful children as a single parent.

“For many parents, a parenting coach is a relief. She can guide your parenting skills and help you understand why your children are doing what they’re doing,” says Caron Goode, Ed.D., founder of the Academy for Coaching Parents. This is especially true for single parents, who must struggle with not only their own role in a child’s life, but the role of the missing parent as well.

The Academy for Coaching Parents International (ACPI) is dedicating to training professional Parenting Coaches with a compassionate, collaborative approach after which graduates can help parents identify priorities and make good choices based on what is optimal for parents and their children. Parent coaches take on the role of a lifetime by helping parents and who can act as a qualified mentor, coach, teacher or listener.

Most people aren’t fulfilled until they are helping others, then they shine. For those interested in the exciting opportunities available in parent coaching, ACPI is a nationally recognized academy for educating and training professional first-class coaches and fervent mentors for parents and families.

Posted by: coachingparents | June 22, 2010

BECOMING A REAL HUMAN BEING


By Lloyd J. Thomas, Ph.D.

Sometimes love hurts.  Sometimes we become “addicted to love.”
Sometimes we confuse love with pain or attachment.  When any of these
misperceptions occur, we miss out on experiencing the most positive
force in our lives…real love.

Learning to love without being addicted to it, is major challenge
for the very young child.  Many studies have been conducted on the
importance of the infant’s deep biological need for a primary
caretaker, usually the mother.  Psychologists know that how your
mother addressed this need had a major impact on your ability, as an
adult, to establish healthy and loving relationships.  It also likely
determined how well you function without such relationships.

Howard Halpern, author of the book, “How To Break Your Addiction To
A Person” indicates that if you are a victim of what he calls
“attachment hunger,” your primary adult relationship will be based on
illusions “in the form of the wish, the fantasy, and the attempt to
recapture the strength, security, and bliss of fusing with another
person.”  If we build our loving relationships on this unmet need for
attachment, we will become hurt, addicted, and miss out on being
loved.

When a mother does not care for, cuddle and nurture a child enough,
the need for attachment (necessary for early survival) is never met.
When you grow up in a family in which this need remains unsatisfied,
you live in a state of unresolved dependency on others.  In her book,
“From Love That Hurts To Love That’s Real,” Sylvia Peterson writes of
this dependency saying: “Your dependency stems partially from the fact
that your basic need for love, trust, warmth, communication, and
intimacy was not fulfilled in your dysfunctional family of origin and
partly because the intricate developmental task of separation and
individuation from mother, father, and family did not take place in a
positive manner.”

So how do we rectify our unfilled dependency needs and their
unhealthy consequences affecting our adult relationships?  At some
point in our maturation, we need to shift our focus to how well we are
loving rather than whether or not we are loved.

In one of my favorite children’s’ books, “The Velveteen Rabbit,”
Margery Williams writes: “The Rabbit sighed.  He thought it would be a
long time before this magic called `real’ happened to him.  He longed
to become Real, to know what it felt like; and yet the idea of growing
shaggy and losing his eyes and whiskers was rather sad.  He wished
that he could become it without these uncomfortable things happening
to him.”

Rabbit has to go through some pretty painful, often frightening
experiences, to become “real.”  People often need to do the same.
Becoming a genuine, healthy, autonomous grown-up often requires you
learn lessons from painful and fearsome experiences.  If these lessons
are not learned, you will generate more hurtful and anxiety-ridden
relationships, until you learn them.

And the primary lesson to be learned in becoming real is: You alone
are capable of creating your own happiness and fulfillment.  When you
realize this lesson, fear diminishes, self-confidence grows, peace of
mind develops and real love begins to evolve.

When you are primarily concerned about your skill at loving, you
gradually become the real person you were meant to be.  Being a lover
of life in all its aspects reflects our genuine human nature.  Become
a “real” lover of yourself, others and Life, and you become genuinely
human.  Self-love is not selfish.  It is the primary psychological
task of all responsible adults.  Loving others if a gift you give
freely in your relationships.  It is not motivated by your own need to
be attached, to be cared for or to be loved.  It is based upon your
desire to participate fully in relationship to others.

When we outgrow (heal up) from our need to be attached to another,
we begin the process of becoming the real individualized person.  We
recognize life as a gift we did not ask for.  Being alive as a human,
is the most wonderful experience any creature can have.  Having
language, self-awareness, a complex human body, a mind, a loving heart
and soul, are all potentially the most delightful and powerful
characteristics anyone can have.  When you acknowledge these
characteristics within yourself, through whatever it takes, you become
a “real” human being.

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

Dr. Thomas is a licensed psychologist, author, speaker, and life
coach.  He serves on the faculty of the International University of
Professional Studies. He recently co-authored (with Patrick Williams)
the book: “Total Life Coaching: 50+ Life Lessons, Skills and
Techniques for Enhancing Your Practice…and Your Life!” (W.W. Norton
2005) It is available at your local bookstore or on Amazon.com.

If you found the above column useful, feel free to share it with
friends.

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Buy on June 8th and retrieve your bonus gifts from the treasure trove at http://www.kidswhoseeghosts.com

If you like to help kids, then you’ll enjoy this newest, cutting edge information. I want to share this particular book, Kids Who See Ghosts, because it is already lighting new fires of knowledge and sparking conversations around the globe. Reading it, you’ll understand how children feel and experience their worlds of imaginary friends, ghosts or spirits.  And you’ll learn how to soothe their fears, how to explore other realms, and help kids be resilient when facing the unknown.

The award-winning author of Raising Intuitive Children, and Mom’s Choice Awards Lightworker of 2008, Dr. Caron Goode interviewed parents, educators, psychologists, a sensei, a skeptic, and psychics to present a well-rounded view of the kids-who-see-ghosts phenomenon. This trend seems to be increasing, which means parents need this book now!

Goode suggests you believe in your children, whether or not you believe in ghosts or spirits. Empowering kids is the goal, helping them to move through their fears and have more strength.

To empower kids and support this work, I am asking that you buy this book, along with me, on Tuesday, June 8th(Link)

Buying on June 8th makes you are eligible to receive several thousand dollars worth of bonus gifts including free offers by acclaimed theater and acting star Shirley McClaine and more free bonuses from Dr. Caron Goode. A complete list of talented partners with free bonus offers is included below. For a detailed listing of all the bonus offers visit the Kids Who See Ghosts website at: http://kidswhoseeghosts.com/buy-now .

  • Yvonne Perry: Writers in the Sky
  • Lynn Andrews: School for Sacred Arts and Training
  • Dr. Tom Goode: EnergizeYouNow.com
  • Dave Markowitz: DaveMarkowitz.com
  • Shanta Gabriel: The Gabriel Messages
  • Glenn Smith: Anxiety and Panic Attacks Gone
  • Hillary Raimo: Intuitive, Metaphysical Teacher, Talk Show Host, Author
  • Johnathan Goldman: Healing Sounds
  • Devra Jacobs: Kinetics
  • Andye Murphy and Gavin Harrill: PeeKSgroup
  • Melissa Peil: Psychic, Teacher, Medium
  • Kathy Kirk: Life Transformation, Natural & Simple
  • Shelagh Jones: Spiritus.com
  • Lynn Serafinn: Spirit Authors.com
  • Ellen Braun: Raising Small Souls.com
  • Melissa Halsey of Wisdom Word.com

Retrieving your bonus items is quick and easy! Here is what you do:

1. Purchase the book and receive the confirmation code for your purchase in an email from Amazon.com.

2.  Visit the Bonus page (http://kidswhoseeghosts.com/buy-now/#verify) to verify your order number of 17 digits, grouped in three sections. An email will be sent providing the link to our Bonus Page. Browse at your leisure. Treat yourself to each gift and enjoy the benefits. Then read the book and become informed and up to date on this topic of increasing interest in today’s world.

Praise for this intriguing, informative and intelligent new approach to a hot topic

Laura Markham, Ph.D., founding editor of AhaParenting.com: “Sixty-five percent of all kids have imaginary friends during their first eight years of life, and countless children report conversations with a loved one who has died. How we understand these facts depends on our belief systems.

Jack Rourke, renowned psychic, parapsychological researcher, and author of Ghost Talk says, “Without confronting the validity of ghosts as an objective phenomena, one thing is certain: The subjective experiences of children who report ghost encounters are quite real and can leave uninformed parents feeling powerless. Kids Who See Ghosts is a compelling resource that draws upon Dr. Goode’s vast experience as a psychotherapist and provides a valuable tool for parents dealing with a paranormal concern.”

Posted by: coachingparents | June 5, 2010

ACPI Founder launches new book for fearful kids


The Academy for Coaching Parents is pleased to be the 12th stop on the Blog Tour for Dr. Goode’s new book, Kids Who See Ghosts, help to guide them through their fears. If you are following the blog tour and missed yesterday’s stop, renowned author, Hillary Raimo, spoke about helping children work with their dream journal at blog stop 10, http://hillaryraimo.blogspot.com/

In the 1980’s the first research on discovering children’s temperaments started at Harvard University. Children born with shy temperaments and followed into childhood had to learn to not shy away from new people and situations in their environment. Rather children learned new skills of how to feel safe with adults nearby, how to initiate action in a new environment rather than be frightened or overwhelmed by it. These are the kinds of skills that children who are frightened by ghosts or spirits have to learn also.Why? In Dr. Goode’s practice with pediatric clients, this type of event, a child seeing a ghost, scared parents also. These situations seemed difficult for parents to handle in relation to escalating fears of their child.

Moms and dads ask themselves, “Does my child possess unique gifts, or is my kid possessed? Will this be a one-time, ‘weird’ event, or is my child destined to be haunted for life? Does my child need psychological help or some kind of meds? Should I believe what my child reports even if I don’t believe in ghosts?”

When kids report ghost sightings, parent’s reactions may range from feeling paralyzed with fear to being curious and supportive. If their children are scared by encounters with the spirit world, parents naturally fret about how to best help their kids through this fear. And this can be a challenge because in some cases fear can be so intense that it causes the child – and sometimes the parent, too – to become physically sick from it. If, on the other hand, children feel open and comfortably connected to the world of ghosts, parents may feel less worried – or even more alarmed. Either way, parents are sure to be perplexed about how to proceed.

That’s why there’s a need for Caron B. Goode’s Kids Who See Ghosts: How to Guide Them Through Fear (Weiser Books, June 2010). In a volume that is enlightening about the frightening, Goode empowers parents to use exceptional thinking to break through fear. She urges them to be avid listeners and to start the right kind of conversations early. And she provides questionnaires, practical exercises, and child-friendly activities to help parents gently guide children along a journey to emotional empowerment.

To continue the blog tour, please visit the fantastic author, Yvonne Perry, at http://thesidseries.blogspot.com. While you visit, read about Yvonne’s phenonemal children’s book called The Sid Series.


Please sign up NOW for the book launch reminder so you can buy Kids Who See Ghosts and receive F*REE  thousands of dollars of personal development gifts on June 8, 2010.

To register, go to: http://www.kidswhoseeghosts.com

(if you are reading this article after that date, you may buy the book directly from that page).

Posted by: coachingparents | May 29, 2010

Parent Coaching as a Recession-Proof Business


We often observe parents who are impatient, angry or exasperated because life nowadays is stressful and hectic. This has made parenting and raising a child a tough and confusing issue at times. How does a parent meet all demands of life and still always be available for your child? How do you deal with issues like discipline, sibling rivalry and unhealthy eating habits? How do you make sure that what you are doing as a parent is appropriate and successful? A parent coach can answer all these questions.

A parent coach is a trained and certified professional who empowers families to resolve conflict and find answers to their issues. Since coaching is about relationships, the main focus is on parent – child relationship; yet the parent might choose individual coaching. A parent coach understands that each family is different. They know how to respect and acknowledge these differences and make the most of them. A parenting coach helps families develop stronger bonds that do not break despite how much distance is put between a parent and a child.

A parent coach undertakes a training program, which can be 9 to 12 months long. Persons interested in parent coaching usually enjoy people and like being in service. You might be a writer, seasoned parent, a teacher, a student or a counselor by profession; and with a certified program you can become a parenting coach and help make a difference in people’s lives. Just as a coach puts the team together and teaches it to function as one organic whole, a parent coach puts families together and helps them to function cooperatively.

Why Pick this Career?

Parent coaching as a career is rewarding and fruitful. You not only earn money but also make a difference in someone’s life. As a parent coach you help families develop deeper and stronger bonds. Under your guidance parents will learn how to raise children who are healthy and happy physically, emotionally and psychologically. You will help parents relate to their children better and vice-versa. The relationship you develop with the families you work with will be personal and lifelong. As a professional parent coach you have the freedom of working from home. You do not have to give up your current employment. Parent coaching gives you the freedom of flexible work hours and you can start part-time. The client and you can decide time of meeting. You can meet the parent in person or hold conversations over telephone or E-Mail. The time span of the meeting is not fixed either. It is a career which gives you the complete freedom of deciding how, when and for how long you want to work.

 Unlike a child or a relationship counselor, your bond with your client will be deeper than professional. You are not solving past problems like a therapist; you are finding answers together to present issues. Your meetings with clients will not be time-oriented sessions where only you are to talk. The sessions you undertake, as a parent coach will be interactive participation from you as well as the client’s side. Also, your unique style of working will be your strength. You will not be expected to fall into a stereotype role.

 Training to be parent coach is both practical and cost effective. These programs are generally undertaken through distance learning. You can train to be a parent coach while studying or working. Even after you have earned your certificate, you have the freedom to decide when you want to step into this field. How long you want to be a professional parent coach is also decided by you alone.

 If you are a parent, a career in parent coaching will prove to be most beneficial. You will know the professional secrets of dealing with issues concerning your children. Your parenting skills will be better than ever. You can also help others gain though your experiences and knowledge. Again you have the freedom of deciding whether you want to work at a professional or personal level.

Parent coaching is an apt career choice for anyone who wants to help people and make a difference. To help bring up a child who turns out to be loving, successful and happy is a reward in itself.

Contact http://www.academyforcoachingparents.com if you want to be a part of this fast growing industry.


Are you ready to solve behavior, social, and relationship problems by learning the latest research and techniques in the parenting field?

The Academy for Coaching Parents International invites you to a relaxing gathering with other parents where you can learn about the latest topics in child behavior, relationship problems and other research and techniques in the parentingfield. Dr. Caron Goode will be leading one of the retreat workshops on May 27th at 10:00pm EST. The workshop topic is “Parenting With Style to Avoid Clashes.”

This FREE online event will include involvement from several ACPI coaches; add to your coaching knoweledge and skills and be sure to include yourself in this wonderful free event. While the online event is free, ticket-buyers will receive over $1,000.00 in bonus materialsall audio recordings of all workshops for future reference, additional unannounced gifts and doorprizes from a number of retreat speakers.

Here are just a few of the topics and benefits you can expect from this online event:

  • How to raise a confident and happy child. (Yes, you can make optimism your family’s dominant attitude!)
  • Proven tools to end disrespectful behavior and sassy attitudes. (Avoiding common parenting mistakes and avoiding power struggles.)
  • Encourage your child to make wise decisions and avoid dangerous behaviors. (Let’s face it– there are many dangerous options that were not as available back when we were growing up!)
  • The secret to balancing family and work. (Yes, you can do it all– and stay sane!)
  • How to help kids overcome stress, anger, and trauma. (New research shows that therapy is often not the answer!)
  • How to motivate to succeed academically. (End the homework nightmare plus expert tricks and tips to help your child focus!)
  • How to deal with meltdowns and tantrums– at any age. (Easily and immediately change children’s behavior–lovingly!)
  • How to follow your personal dreams. (You do not need to put your goals on hold because you are a Mom!)
  • Tips from an Organization Coach helps you find more time and space in your busy life. (More hours in your day and extra room in your closets and drawers– Wow!)
  • Spa product giveaways. (Check your mail for your organza bag of pampering products!)
  • Acclaimed ebooks and expert audios. (Extra gifts and prizes just for registering today!)

For more information on all the workshop speakers, bonus materials and more, view the Parenting Retreat information page. Of, if you are already convinced of the benefits of this wonderful opportunity register instantly today!

http://parentingretreat.com/caron

Posted by: coachingparents | May 26, 2010

Night Terrors, Ghosts and Things That Go Bump In The Night


Young children can often experience night terrors, wake up from a dreamy sleep and perceive shadows floating in the  room. Their growing brains and shifting brain states create changing perceptions all day long. Sometimes, in a preschooler’s world, moving from a television cartoon to watching a movie to helping mom cook to reading a book can seem like a long tunnel of shifting perceptions. Yet when a child sees an image like a deceased grandparent consistently over time, what does that really mean? How we interpret such an image depends upon our culture.

In some cultures, children who see grandma are taken to therapists and the family discusses accepting that the child believes what he or she sees and how to support or not support that, depending upon the family values. In another culture, grandma is the young child’s guardian who is present from the time of birth, and they are conversant.

If you want to know how to guide your child through their ghost experiences, whether real or not real to you, follow the blog tour for Dr. Caron Goode’s newest book, Kids Who See Ghosts, guide them through their fears. Today is Day 2 at http://www/margodill.com/blog.

Visit http://www.margodill.com/blog for Dill's interview with Dr. Goode

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